Why should I change myself to become better if I have nobody in my life? This is a two-pronged question. Because when we say "better," what do we really mean? And that word, better, means two things to the person who asked this question. Better in the sense of, "I want to feel better. I want my mind to stop fighting me. I want to be happier, healthier, and better…
We live in a world that, at times, can seem to celebrate and reward the greediest among us. We live by our own code of values and morals, yet we see people who are unencumbered by ethics get ahead and who seemingly don't have a care in the world.But the truth is, there is a greater joy than the fleeting pleasure of accumulation. There is a greater and lasting peace…
As Eckhart Tolle shared in The Power of Now, he tells the story of two monks walking through a forest. They come upon a river and see a woman struggling to cross. Even though it's against their rules and customs to touch a woman, one of the monks goes over, lifts the woman, and helps her across the river.He sets her down, makes sure she’s okay, and then the two…
There was this woman I knew. She was very wealthy, and she had the perfect life. On paper, and from the outside looking in, everyone would say that’s the American dream. But this person was never happy. She was always focused on the negative. If she went to a five-star hotel, she would change rooms three or four times — because the wallpaper might have been peeling a little, or…
I have a viewpoint and an attitude of loving this moment and wanting for nothing else. Because I noticed a while ago that when you want something that is not happening right now, you suffer. And I didn’t want to suffer, so I cultivated this mindset of making whatever happens in my life, in this moment, exactly what I want.I used to want to be the richest guy in the…
All human beings have these egos, this mind-made conception of who we are. And it only survives when it feels important. And when this ego feels threatened, because it is comparing itself to the wealth or success or looks of someone else, it suffers, and it makes us suffer immensely. To really get to the root of this suffering, we need to recognize that we are not this ego, and…
Most of thel problems in our lives are generated by our thinking mind. When we’re depressed, we are constantly thinking dark, negative thoughts. When we’re anxious, we’re constantly thinking insecure, anxious thoughts. When we’re caught in the drama of life, we are usually retelling that story of drama in our minds, again and again. To be free from this compulsive thinking is to be free from much of the suffering…
I had dreams of people visiting me in the forest and feeling like, "Oh no, I broke the rules," and they were trying to tempt me to come back to society. But it was one of the most beautiful, profound, enlightening experiences of my life that I would never trade for anything.When I was a kid, I remember hearing that Jesus of Nazareth went into the desert for 40 days…
Most of us take life too seriously. We put so much pressure on ourselves that it hurts our ability to do our best. Because we know that when we are relaxed, we are confident, we're not second-guessing ourselves, and we are thinking in the clearest way possible. When fear and pressure cloud our judgment, we are not going to be our best."Holding grudges" is such a great phrase, because we…
Q: I need to be accompanied by friends all the time. I am so desperate and needy and unhappy. Help!Human beings are social. We're social creatures; we thrive with close connections. And it is because we needed each other to survive. So, we are naturally drawn to those close bonds that make us feel safe. Sometimes, when we have felt unsafe, we may use friends and pets and other devices…
If something here helped you feel less alone, would you help me keep it alive?
Even the smallest support matters.
Weekly Writings from the Desk of Todd Perelmuter
