Still Holding On? How to Stop Reliving Negative Experiences

As Eckhart Tolle shared in The Power of Now, he tells the story of two monks walking through a forest. They come upon a river and see a woman struggling to cross. Even though it's against their rules and customs to touch a woman, one of the monks goes over, lifts the woman, and helps her across the river.He sets her down, makes sure she’s okay, and then the two…

Todd Perelmuter’s Spiritual Journey

I was going on this mission with the purpose of helping people through whatever I could learn. It was terrifying, yes — but it was also deeply infused with a sense that this was the right thing to do. This is what my heart was calling me toward. I don’t know where the idea first got planted in my mind — that I should learn about spirituality, that I should…

Why Don’t Spiritual Teachers Get Drained by Everyone Else’s Pain?

Any spiritual teacher or healer is going to encounter immense sadness, anger, trauma, and stress, because that’s who gets drawn to this path. And it’s absolutely vital to be able to hold space for those emotions without absorbing them.The same way I dealt with my own pain is how I help others transmute theirs. Because if I take on their stress, I become useless. I lose my ability to serve.…

Mindfulness Can Ease Emotional As Well As Physical Pain

If somebody is in a lot of pain, and they're going through some serious illness, and they are living in the past, and they’re loving it, then I would never tell anyone to change. But if they're asking this question, then I assume there is some stress, and that the underlying reality of the present moment is causing a great deal of distress, and that they are not able to…

When the Feeling of Worthlessness Creeps in, What Do You Do?

All human beings have these egos, this mind-made conception of who we are. And it only survives when it feels important. And when this ego feels threatened, because it is comparing itself to the wealth or success or looks of someone else, it suffers, and it makes us suffer immensely. To really get to the root of this suffering, we need to recognize that we are not this ego, and…

The End of Inner Drama: How to Break Free from Compulsive Thinking

Most of thel problems in our lives are generated by our thinking mind. When we’re depressed, we are constantly thinking dark, negative thoughts. When we’re anxious, we’re constantly thinking insecure, anxious thoughts. When we’re caught in the drama of life, we are usually retelling that story of drama in our minds, again and again. To be free from this compulsive thinking is to be free from much of the suffering…

Do You Have Ego?

When asked if I have an ego myself, I'm reminded of the scene from Fight Club, where Edward Norton shoots himself in the head, trying to kill his alter ego, Brad Pitt. The fact of the matter is, we all have a thinking mind. And it's important for surviving in this world. That thinking mind is where problem-solving, working through complex situations, finding solutions, and creativity come from — and…

50 Days in the Wild: A Meditation Experiment That Transformed Me

I had dreams of people visiting me in the forest and feeling like, "Oh no, I broke the rules," and they were trying to tempt me to come back to society. But it was one of the most beautiful, profound, enlightening experiences of my life that I would never trade for anything.When I was a kid, I remember hearing that Jesus of Nazareth went into the desert for 40 days…

What I’ve Learned from My Travels

When I was a Creative Director in advertising, I had to travel a lot for work and my companies would always put me up in 5-star hotels. It wasn’t the sheets or marble walls or gold trim that impressed me. It was always something that cost absolutely nothing: the attention and generosity of the staff.I am currently on a family vacation (hence the infrequent newsletters), showing my dear mother-in-law the…

What I’m Watching and What I’m Thinking

The Golden Globes and awards season is here. I didn’t watch the Globes, but I do love the modern art of cinema. Few artforms are so captivating, moving, immersive, powerful, persuasive and empathizing. For two hours, you can experience what it is like to forgo identification with the self and identify with the characters in the story instead.While this escape can become addictive (because dissociation with our ego is extremely…