When someone we love dies, where do they go? What is death?These are stories. They may be universal. We may all suffer immensely, but we are suffering a story. If your friend is moving away forever but going to live at Disney World, their favorite place on earth, you’re not really that sad. So it is our stories that we believe about death that make us suffer.In regard to something we…
What do you do if your partner is spiritually at a different place than you are? Ultimately, this question comes down to two things. There are really two broad stages of spirituality and spiritual development. Of course, within each stage there are many levels, but we can loosely divide them into beginner and advanced, those new, inexperienced meditators and mindful practitioners, and those who have been on the path for…
Q: After leaving the US and traveling to all these places, why did you return to the US? TODD ANSWERS: For me, a peaceful or happy life, which could be found in a cave or a forest, meditating in solitude, is not the point of life. My purpose is to look back and feel that I built great relationships, built financial stability for my family, and lived a life filled…
We often notice that when people are faking positivity and pressuring positivity, we tend to find that this is really a desperate cry for help. Because they are unable to face reality. They want to face a fantasy. And it’s a fragile and unstable happiness. I’m going to say something a little controversial — but it’s true: toxic positivity doesn’t actually exist. What we usually mean when we say “toxic…
No matter what we are suffering from, it tends to stem from us being stuck to a mental story about that thing that happened. Usually, the thing itself is long over, but we are unable to let go of the past. The past then shapes our present and can dictate our future as well. When we have been through a traumatic experience, there's really two things we need to do…
Learning to trust people after being lied to is not easy. It can fill us with confusion when dealing with others, we don’t know if we’re being too trusting or too cynical. We struggle to maintain a positive view of people while also protecting ourselves from being taken advantage of. Our brain has a way of creating strong memories of negative experiences as a defense mechanism to prevent them from…
We’ve all seen the memes about cutting out anyone in your life who drains your energy or doesn’t appreciate you. But those people too are clearly suffering and maybe we can help them. If we cut every person out of our lives who isn’t perfect, we’d have to cut everyone out of our lives, including ourselves. So where’s the line? How can we show compassion and forgiveness, but still protect…
We humans are a funny bunch of social creatures. We are not machines who can just change our emotions at will. And one of the things we crave almost as much, if not more so, than food is human connection.A hug or a hand on someone else's is the simplest yet most profound act of showing love and compassion. It can instantly transform our mental and emotional states. In just…
No one can bring out our best and worst selves quite like the people we're closest to. When approached mindfully, relationships can be incredible opportunities to grow in presence and as people. But when there is insecurity, doubt, jealousy, suspicion, or possessiveness in relationships, this can create a toxic, fertile soil for mindlessness and trouble to grow. Because most of us want to be in a relationship, we can cling…
Trust is essential to any relationship. So what do you do when someone breaks that trust? Why do people lie and how can we be loving and forgiving, while also protecting ourselves from being lied to again? This article takes an honest look at how we can build up trust again, not just in our relationships, but in our future as well. Forgiveness and trust, while protecting ourselves from dishonesty,…
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