Hello my friend,

I understand the urge. I’ve been there. Something crazy happens in my life, and my first instinct is to pull out my phone. Read the news. Scroll endlessly on social media. Distract myself until my stress and anxiety pass.

Several years ago, before I learned what I’m about to share, I would get lost in my phone for days and weeks hoping that when I came out of it, the bad feelings would be gone. In one instance, I had a landlord who needed to do a lot of work on my apartment. He asked me to pay for everything and said he would pay me back (I see you already know where this is going). I was actually happy to pay because of all the free credit card points I’d rack up. So, after a few thousand dollars worth of repairs to his property, he hit me with the, “I didn’t approve that.”

A storm of stress, panic and fear overtook me. I did whatever I could to escape myself — stay busy, develop a phone addiction, watch shows, and disappear for a while. Unfortunately, all it did was make me more stressed, more anxious, more worried, and more addicted.

The solution wasn’t to find healthy addictions like exercise or carrots. It was to sit with my thoughts and emotions. It was to take a few deep breaths and just watch the panic. Understand the panic. Notice the nature of panic, how it moves and flows, how it arises and passes away, and how it’s actually not so bad.

The fear of panic is far worse than the panic. Panic is just racing thoughts combined with a fast heart rate, higher body temperature, shallow breathing, etc… Not so bad. When we learn this deep down through practice and experience, panic becomes our friend. It becomes a welcome companion, just passing through. No big deal. And then guess what. It becomes less and less extreme. We no longer have the anxiety of having anxiety. We no longer crave peace and calm because we know we can handle anything. And that is precisely how we become truly peaceful and calm.

Before you pull out that phone, before you do whatever it is that you do when you’re feeling stressed or anxious, do yourself a favor and just watch your thoughts, emotions and bodily sensations very closely. Examine them thoroughly. There may be some discomfort and you really want to pull out your phone. Just keep watching a little bit longer. The more you realize you have the strength to endure what you find uncomfortable, the more you take back control of your life from the events that are out of your control.

P.S. Here are some other topics that I covered this week:

1. Why does chasing happiness only leave us exhausted? (Watch Here)
   
   
2. How can we break through our limitations to see the ultimate truth of this mystical universe? (Watch Here)
   
   
3. What is the cure for boredom? (Listen Here)

Much love,

Todd