No matter what we are suffering from, it tends to stem from us being stuck to a mental story about that thing that happened. Usually, the thing itself is long over, but we are unable to let go of the past. The past then shapes our present and can dictate our future as well. When we have been through a traumatic experience, there's really two things we need to do…
Most people tend to hear negative stories about themselves or others and believe those. It’s very difficult for many people to believe positive stories about themselves. And it doesn’t always come from others, often it comes from our own mind. Our own mind tells a negative, fear-based story, and it shapes a pessimistic and scary world for us. Whether someone says something rude or critical and we believe it, or…
Our bodies respond to the thoughts in our head. We make choices because of our thoughts. And if we have a scary thought, we feel fear. If our thoughts are angry in nature, we feel anger. If we have worrying thoughts, we feel stressed and anxious. If they are positive, we feel good and happy. We think reality effects our thoughts, but it is our thoughts that create our reality.…
Learning to trust people after being lied to is not easy. It can fill us with confusion when dealing with others, we don’t know if we’re being too trusting or too cynical. We struggle to maintain a positive view of people while also protecting ourselves from being taken advantage of. Our brain has a way of creating strong memories of negative experiences as a defense mechanism to prevent them from…
A question I received recently was, "I added 4 inches of height to my dating profile. I now have dates lined up for the first time in my life. Now, I am tempted to keep it this way." These days, it may seem like everyone is stretching the truth on dating sites. Camera angles are purposefully mysterious, pixelated old photos hide our age, and the bios may better describe fictional…
Study after study has shown that meditation can lower our perception of pain. Some dentists now even offer meditation training for pain reduction instead of using anesthesia!The fact is, our mindset not only affects how much we feel pain; it also often creates the pain by holding tension in the body. Tension in the body is one of the leading causes of chronic pain. It leads to tight muscles which…
We’ve all seen the memes about cutting out anyone in your life who drains your energy or doesn’t appreciate you. But those people too are clearly suffering and maybe we can help them. If we cut every person out of our lives who isn’t perfect, we’d have to cut everyone out of our lives, including ourselves. So where’s the line? How can we show compassion and forgiveness, but still protect…
We all have trouble thinking before we speak and act. We want to be present and flow, but we also want to be careful and thoughtful of what we do. So how do we think before we act and still be present? How do we stop impulsive behavior, giving into addiction and addictive urges, and reacting from anger or losing our temper? Why do we sometimes say something we don't…
We humans are a funny bunch of social creatures. We are not machines who can just change our emotions at will. And one of the things we crave almost as much, if not more so, than food is human connection.A hug or a hand on someone else's is the simplest yet most profound act of showing love and compassion. It can instantly transform our mental and emotional states. In just…
There are no wrong turns on your path if your intuition and instincts are your guides. Be careful about letting others take away your inner voice and your inner power. This path is about liberation and freedom, not freeing ourselves from our own ego only for it to be replaced by someone else’s ego. No enlightened being would charge huge sums of money for their “secret.” Retreats in beautiful places will…
If something here helped you feel less alone, would you help me keep it alive?
Even the smallest support matters.
Weekly Writings from the Desk of Todd Perelmuter
