Addicted to Approval? Learn How to Overcome

We all have a story about ourselves and our lives that plays on repeat in our mind. It may be negative, it may be positive, or it may be mixed. No matter what the story says, we tend to believe it and defend it at all cost. Even if it makes us miserable and insecure, we hold on tightly to it. It is our worldview, and if it were wrong our world would collapse.

If our mental narrative is negative, then we reject other people’s praise. If our story is causing us suffering, we will argue with the people who want to help us. (In my latest podcast episode, I talk about relationships, how to know when to give grace, when to create boundaries, and how when needed to walk away with peace and love.)

If our mental narrative is positive but delusional, we will suffer whenever anyone else deflates our ego. It will be an untenable, shaky confidence that will always need praise. We may think we are doing the right thing by forcing happy thoughts, but we will still be susceptible to the opinions of others.

The key is not to change our thoughts, but to change our mindset. If we want a million dollars, we don’t think to ourselves, “I have a million dollars,” over and over again. This will make us actually feel the lack more, and it will make us become disappointed, disillusioned, and disheartened that the million dollars didn’t come fast enough.

Instead, we need to feel gratitude for our journey of growth and evolution. On any journey, there can be flat tires, wrong turns and detours. But that doesn’t mean we’re not getting closer to where we want to be. And it doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the scenery and company along the way.

 

Here’s What I Want You to Do This Week:

For a few minutes in the morning and a few minutes at night, practice visualizing the life of your dreams. 

 

Visualize how it will feel to achieve your business, relationships, and family goals. See every detail of the life you want. And do this until you feel the gratitude for being on this journey, no matter where you happen to be along the way. Feel the confidence of what it’s like when you have everything you’ve been working towards. And stay in this mindset until a natural smile comes across your face. This is how we can have our future gratitude and confidence right now.

There is no mental difference between being grateful for our journey or for reaching our destination. There is no difference between feeling confident on our journey or feeling confident once we’ve reached our destination. In fact, it is gratitude and confidence that will ensure we will go further, reach greater heights than we could even imagine, have more enthusiasm and energy to get there, be fearless, and actually love the journey of life.

Much love,

ToddPS – In my latest YouTube video, I share the insights and lessons I learned during my 50-day meditation in the forest of New Zealand and how it changed me.

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You deserve happiness.Your loved ones deserve happiness.

The Art of Gratitude | Short Film

Gratitude is the most important human emotion because it alone determines the quality of our life. This film is a roadmap back to our grateful hearts.