Mindful Insight Why Do We Get Hurt When People Say Mean Things? When someone says something mean to us, we are affected by it because we are identifying with the ego. We are reacting from a state of mind, which is unstable and easily perturbed by the words of others. When we are firmly rooted in the present moment, we realize that words are just vibrations in the air, and…
Most people tend to hear negative stories about themselves or others and believe those. It’s very difficult for many people to believe positive stories about themselves. And it doesn’t always come from others, often it comes from our own mind. Our own mind tells a negative, fear-based story, and it shapes a pessimistic and scary world for us. Whether someone says something rude or critical and we believe it, or…
We live in a world that, at times, can seem to celebrate and reward the greediest among us. We live by our own code of values and morals, yet we see people who are unencumbered by ethics get ahead and who seemingly don't have a care in the world.But the truth is, there is a greater joy than the fleeting pleasure of accumulation. There is a greater and lasting peace…
From Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterYou may not know it, but I am by nature a very private person. Even on my spiritual journey that took me around the world, I never posted about my travels. I understand the stress that social media can cause when people see others posting their travel photos, and I didn’t want to contribute to that.But then I met the remarkable woman who…
Q: Dear Todd, I had someone pretend to like me for a year and then she told me that she was using me and that the whole time she hated me. It messed me up so much. I still think that everyone hates me because idk if I can trust people. What if they are like her? What if I’m annoying? Is there something wrong with me? I also hate…
Difficult people. We have all dealt with them, we will all surely deal with them again, and chances are very good that we've even been that person from time to time. So, how can we better deal with people who push our buttons? How can we prevent our own buttons from getting pushed? Luckily, the answer is the same for both. An interaction between difficult people is a battle of…
From Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterCruel words can only hurt us if they are tinged with truth. Not with objective truth, but with our own personal truth. Objectively, no words would ever hurt us because we would be looking at our situation rationally, from all angles, and we’d be honest with ourselves about what we know and don’t know.If that inner voice in our head is self-critical, other…
Someone recently asked me this question about how to respond to people who hurt us. I get it, believe me. Our first (unconscious) instinctual reaction is to respond with anger. But this would be a reaction that lacks wisdom, patience, perspective, and most importantly, efficacy. It is just not effective when communicating to respond with anger. People's walls go up and they dig even deeper into their positions.So how can…
Love is the glue that holds this universe together. It is the gravity that unites two star crossed lovers. And it is the only reason we exist — it brought our parents together, love nourished and protected us through infancy, and it is the only reason we haven’ blown ourselves up yet.Love is a feeling as innate as hunger. Instead of leading us to food, love guides us towards being more…
Q: Dear Todd, if mean people who hurt others have a "disconnect from infinite joy and peace within", then what about those people who have had horrible lives and yet don't hurt people or lie, cheat, etc…? Aren't we just giving these mean people a free pass? Making an excuse for them? TODD ANSWERS: I definitely don’t give them a pass, but I just don’t know what good comes from…
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